God, me and our relationship

A friend of mine called me yesterday, and we had a long discussion about the most profound topic of all: existence of God. I have a few observations about my own connection with God:

1. Whenever I visit a temple, which is bit rare, I simply feel no connection with the statues there. Sometimes, I fail to recognize the various Gods housed in the temple.

Because of this lack of connection, I also don't feel like bowing down or folding my hands in front of those statues.

2. Having said that, I do remember thinking about God in certain specific situations. This has invaribaly happened in the hospital when one of my family members (mother, father, daughter, wife, etc.) is seriously sick and/or undergoing some kind of surgery. My interpretation of these instances is that when I am really, really desperate about something, I do turn to God.

3. Do I believe in the existence of God? Well, based on my actions, it seems, I am a believer, but only in certain specific situations. In normal day to day life, I don't think of God at all, and I don't worship.

4. I must add here that the reason for this strange relationship with God lies in my upbringing. I never saw my father and mother worshiping, except on festivals. We hardly visited temples though there was one nearby. I remember my mother telling once: "God lies in our deeds. Just do the right thing."

5. Finally, let me conclude with where I do see the glimpses of God: When I come face to face with a really innocent child, I do sometimes get this feeling that I am encountering God. So not only in a hospital, I do think of God when I am with an innocent child. The key word here is "innocent."

I had no plans of writing about God or anything today, but that's life: Unpredictable and mysterious.